Lindalmie

Thank you, Jess; needed to see this

I must be the most gullible idiot in the whole freakin’ world.  Or this is karma, b/c I’m sure this must have been how my mom felt when I was a teenager.  Like you just fed me a bullshit sandwich and I just gobbled it right up with a big ole’ grin on my happy little face.  I was really mad at you before.  REALLY mad.  With good reason, to the best of my knowledge.  I had actually only just started to think maybe I could let it go.  You are really young still, with a lot to learn and it’s perfectly possible that you were only analyzing your own prejudices in an objective way when you made that comparison to my family being trailer trash.  I do that kind of thing a lot myself, where I think about how things make me feel and what makes me uncomfortable and wonder why.  So that could have been what you were getting at.  (Mmm mmm, bullshit sandwich, my favorite!  I even made that one all by myself!)  Then, I heard the news tonight that made me mad and I realized I was DEFINITELY not finished being upset from before, and I may have blown things out of proportion a bit by actually calling your cell phone and freaking out about it.  I cried for like 45 minutes.  Not that pussy, boo-hoo shit, either, I don’t play that shit.  I was fucking bawling my stupid eyes out, cursing, and banging my fists on the countertop.  I can honestly not remember the last time I had to swallow a rage lump like that.  Not that it hasn’t happened before, but definitely been awhile.  Alex actually seemed worried when he left me to go to the store.  Then you called.  You were so apologetic and sweet with your little perfectly understandable explanation.  I was all understanding and fucking gullible idiot moron and why the fuck how the hell did you do that?  I want very much to be mad at you right now, doubly mad because I’m mad from what you said before and what you did, but no.  What the hell is this shit?  Fuck you.  There.  Now I feel a little better…I guess.